Day of confusion, Cryin', and Anxiety

Today was the first day of School for Collin. Until now Collin has either been with Mimi, Laura or myself. So we went to school got out of the truck and went into the building, we walk down the hall to the classroom and Collin did not have an idea of what or where we were, although I told him we were at school. So I introduced him to his teacher and put his things away and then he figured it out. Daddy was leaving me, WAAAAAA,WAAAA, Collin started to cry and look at me with the "why do you hate me so much" look "what did I do to deserve this" then I got the "I will be better " hug as if to say don't leave me I don't know anyone here. So I told him to make some friends and showed him a Tractor that was on the floor.

None of that mattered though. He was wise to what was going on. So I just left, but I did not really leave. I waited for what seemed eternity and peaked back into the window, only to see Collin looking right at me making him cry louder. So then I really left. I mean I walked further down the hall away from Collin and then I turned around and went back to peak on him again. Yet there he was looking right at me as if he could smell me or something. So then I REALLY left and went to talk to the admin lady. But before I left for the day, I started to walk down the hall and they were headed out of the room to go play outside with Collin, still cryin', looked up and saw me peeking around the corner, DANGIT!

I learned my lesson: Collin has super powers and used his super sense of smell to smell me. So that started the Day of Confusion and Anxiety that I had because I am now convinced that I am the worst Dad ever for leaving him there all alone with nobody he knows.

I go to pick him up this afternoon and he sees me and I think here it comes, he is going to run over and hug me like there is no tomorrow. NOPE! He does a "drive by" as Laura calls it where he runs over and touches me and then keeps on going. No hoopla, no I missed you nothing. Does this kid know I stewed over leaving him all day, I could barely get anything done my mind was on him all day? I only called once, but they called me once so hearing that he was OK twice today helped some.

All in all, it was a good day so tomorrow is day TWO........