Challenging Week

It's been a tough week with working so many hours for my usual tax deadline.  What makes it even more tough is that Grandma H is not here anymore.  I am tearing up just thinking about it now.  Daddy has had a more difficult time than he thought since she passed.  He misses her and has regrets.  I have hard this is normal after a parent passes.  Can you possibly think of everything to talk about?  You don't want to bring up difficult subjects while your parent is lying there in pain....so you don't.  You talk about your day, what Collin did and what the doctors say.

A few days ago, Daddy told Collin that he was going to Grandma H's house.  Collin wanted to know why and Daddy said he just needed to go over there.  Collin said, "He can get her something really nice to wear, like a dress, for her to be buried in."  What a sweetheart!  I told Daddy that he sure could do that.  Collin has been to a funeral before but the person was not cremated like Grandma H wanted to be.  We have not explained that she will be buried but it will not be like what he has seen before.  A friend suggested to have her already buried before the family has the grave site service.  That way, no one, including Collin, will have to seen the tiny box be put into the ground.

During one of our nightly talks before bed, Collin started to cry.  He said that he misses playing soccer with her and watching her shows.  I told him that is normal and he should feel sad.  Wasn't he happy that he did get to enjoy those times and has those memories of her?

This weekend, we started to clean her house out.  I thought Collin would have a rough time but he seemed to be OK.  Actually, we all did.  Collin watch his usual movies while Mimi and I started to clean out the kitchen.  At one point, he filled up a large bag of stuffed animals and games from his room at her house.  He has since slept with all of these animals.  "These are from Grandma H and I want them close to me." 

We are making it and will be fine as each day goes by.  Love you Grandma H.  We think of you every day.  We are glad that we got to know you better in the 2 1/2 years that you lived near us.  Collin will always have the memories of her picking him up from school, playing video games or playing outside.  He fondest memories were spending the night at her house.  He loved to watch movies with her and sleep in her bed.  She would kick him out to his room sometimes because he does still snore REALLY loud.  :)